Day 12 (2011)

0:10 - TODAY: Couple of different things on my heart. Not sure which direction we will go.

➡ 0:20 - PREVIOUSLY: meditating in the word  RECAP: When you read the word take it personally. Commune a lot with God - talk to God (as you read). Even with songs I don’t sing “Him”, I sing “You.” Little stuff like that gets it real.

➡ 0:50 - TODAY: Love / Becoming Love. I’ve also got fasting on my heart today.

➡ 1:15 - FUTURE TOPICS: Other topics to cover at some point in the future: intercession - healthy v. unhealthy - baptism of the Holy Spirit - what that really is and the scriptural precedence, so that you can explain it to others - there are so many questions on that subject - “I thought I got the Holy Spirit when I got saved.” - “You get everything when you are born again” - “I thought that was only for back then - we’ve got the word now”.

➡ 2:00 - I’ve got fasting on my heart this morning probably because it can so connect with communion, relating, fellowship with God and coming into a place of revelation.

➡ 2:25 - When we talk about love I am going to use a lot of examples of communing with the Lord, meditating in the word. We’ll look at scriptures on love in the next week or so and we’ll show you what it looks like to commune those with the Lord and when your heart says I know that’s the will of God.

Commune the "Want To" of Your Heart

3:00 - Don't be discouraged by where you are not - You are saved by grace - Share your willingness to be changed with the Lord - Who has ever seen something in the word and known that it’s the will of God but felt far away from it? It’s something that is supposed to be in you in the Lord and you wonder where you missed that.

3:30 - Some people read the word and get so aware of where they are not, instead of where God is calling them. It’s hard for them to read their Bible because they feel like it is in their face. They get discouraged. When this happens the last thing you can do is just bite your lip and do that. You’ll try hard, fail and get more discouraged. No, you are saved by grace through faith. So the best thing you can do is address it by faith to the Lord and share your “want to,” your willingness…

5:10 - Share your “want to”, your willingness with the Lord - Lord I thank You that I'm called to this. And it is so my heart to be in this place right here (impatience). Father, I feel like I am so lacking in the area of patience. I feel like things trouble me, bother me, I get short with people, I get frustrated quickly, I'm like, "Get on with it." And Father, I realize that love and patience go hand in hand. And I thank You, that You are cultivating my heart. It is my desire to be just what You created me to be. And I thank You Father, that it is not my call to be short with people. I realize that is not who You are. And I thank You... You go on and just release faith...

5:50 - Some of us think that it has to be more complicated than faith. It’s not. It’s you saying, “yes” - “wanting to.”

5:55 - Even if you are a long way away from being where He wants you to be, the fact that you "want to" is a huge step in the right direction - I get excited when I see “want to” in people. They think they have a problem and are broken up and weeping. I’m excited that they care so much because I know that is the change in their lives, right there. I get excited when you care. He does too.

6:30 - Some people are messing up on purpose and don’t care. But when someone cares that’s the part that you need to highlight. So that you are not harsh with yourself or others.

7:00 - You are the steward of your own heart. I hold myself accountable. Outside of the word of God and the spirit of God, there’s nobody that disciplines me more than me. I call myself into account in the light of grace.

8:40 - Opening prayer - our hearts aligned to truth

Pure Motives - Twisted Motives

10:00 - Pure motives are really important in the Christian life - Why are you doing what you are doing? - The Christian life is simple. A lot of it is motivation, perspective, the “why” behind your life. Fasting is a huge area in that. Fasting has to do with the why behind your life.

10:25 - A pure motive is important for fasting - Receive His love - Become that love back to God and to others - You can get into works with fasting. Fasting to find favor, when you already have favor. Fasting to please the Lord, when He is already pleased to love you - He created you in His image. He loves that I receive His love. It’s His good pleasure to give me the kingdom. It pleases Him, makes Him feel good to give me who He is. He takes good pleasure in giving me of Himself. Why? Because He created us to be one. That is so intimate. And here we are trying to please Him. You can fast for wrong reasons. You can fast for right reasons.

➡ 11:30 - Scriptural fasting - adds to and increases what we are talking about - communion and knowing God and walking with God.

12:20 - Seeking the affirmation of men is not a pure motive of love - It shows you haven't fully received His love - There’s a lot in Mat. 6 about motives. Don't sound a trumpet...etc. Motive: to be seen by men - drawing attention to yourself - you need affirmation, approval. It means you don’t see yourself clear and you need men to affirm you, establish you.

13:15 - Before Christ we all had a desperate need for love - Don't try to draw that love from men but from God - How can you believe who receive honor from one another… John 5:44 If you’re in a rat race to receive honor, esteem by people, how can you believe? You’ll never pay the price of faith because of what men think. What people think is the priority of your life. Drawing identify from affirmation, approval. And if that is not coming in a steady stream then you really don’t feel good about yourself - more desperate - more insecure. Now you need it even more. We all lived this way before Christ.

14:50 - Unfortunately, we don’t make the switch after Christ. We still receive rejection from men. We don’t understand who we have become.

15:40 - How do you talk about the signs / blessings without soaking up the glory for yourself? How do you share those testimonies? -

Be affirmed in God - Don't draw affirmation through the way God uses you - ...without drawing attention to myself or feeling affirmed through that. - Be established in your communion with God. Affirmed in ministry - it’s healthy when you aren’t looking for that and you’re doing what you are doing for His name’s sake and for people - when your heart is sincere to bless others and you’re not doing it to be noticed, to derive identity. Some people serve in a ministry to fit in - to draw attention and have people acknowledge that. When you have that kind of motive in ministry it opens the door to be hurt, let down, feel unappreciated. It’s impossible for me to feel unappreciated because I am not doing it to be appreciated. How did I get that way? I am in love. He’s amazing. Acknowledging Him opens you up for Him to work through you all the more.

20:35 - You can be driven by what people think even though you are anointed. People pleasing. Just stop now and get a grip.

21:00 - Our motives became twisted through the fall - When we are born again our motives need to change - We’ve got motives that are twisted. Became twisted at the fall. Not created that way. He made us in His image, to be love, to be pure. So Christian living - is more than manifesting, being filled with the Spirit - it’s all about living from the right place.

21:20 - Purity - The gospel brings you back to purity - a pure foundation. The pure in heart shall see God. Purity - a safe place - everything I am doing is for the right reason. How do you get to that place? Communion, praying...

21:40 - You get pure motives through communion with God - How do you get to that place? Communion with God.

21:50 - Father, I have a tendency to feel selfish, to feel needed, to feel like I need people to approve me. And the truth is You love me. You've accepted me. You approve of me. I don't need to gain anything from men. I have gained everything from You. Father, you are the one refining and redefining my heart and You're the one that is making all things new. Father, form me in love. Purify my heart even more. Cause me to be just like You because I'm Your boy and You live in me. Yay for You, God.

22:50 - We haven't been taught to pray that way. Prayer reduced to… [an example of false humility prayer]. False humility - "It's a wonder you even consider me Lord. I am so selfish. But somehow you put up with me and love me. I don't get it because you know how wretched I can be..." Focused on who you are apart from Him. I don’t want to ever see myself apart from Him. I want to see myself in Him.

23:50 - Thanks for this ministry - What an honor to be in this ministry Lord. And what an honor that You would even flow through me. It's so beautiful that You would speak through my mouth into the life of another and encourage them and impart something to them through me. Because You made me for this. You saw this for me before anyone knew me. Thank You for bringing me home. And thank You for being so awesome in Your love and awesome in Your mercy and awesome in Your forgiveness. Thank You that You never changed Your mind about me and You made me awesome in You.

24:40 - Communing realigns your heart even though there is a tendency to be selfish. You are addressing it through prayer, through faith - and grace comes and molds and shapes - leaving a masterpiece.

25:15 - Purity - Cut ties with what you're not - Father I've got the temptation to do this. But when I look at Christ, I realize that I wasn't made this way. This is not my lot in life. This isn't how You made me and who I am because I don't see it in Jesus' heart and I don't see Him struggling in this area. And I thank You that I don't have to struggle either because I am Your son. And Father, I am so willing to become love. And I thank You that You are manifesting Yourself to me and You are causing me to become love - to know love - to look through love and to be love. God, I am in. I am saying yes and I am running to the finish line. You are my helper, what can man do to me?... That's prayer. That's intimacy.

26:25 - Potential in the seed - “What if you are wrong? What if it’s not true? And you’ve given your whole life.” - What if I’m not wrong? And you haven’t given your life. If I am wrong, I’ve done nothing but good and helped a lot of people. What if you are a seed that remained a seed - abiding alone. It never died so it never sprouted. In the seed is the potential of what could have been. There are forests in that seed. Unless the seed falls to the ground and dies it will just stay a potential - and after a while it will be “what could have been.” And never be a legacy - destiny. [Example]

29:25 - (Before Jesus) What sprouted and grew was contrary to truth. We were born again.

30:00 - Participant's comment - seeking approval. You have my approval.

31:00 - We've got to die to self to really live like He designed us to live - It is impossible to seek God sincerely through communion and transformation without the seed falling to the ground and dying. God will father those areas of your life. He’ll make it known to you. Hidden needs in our lives for attention, affirmation - a motive outside of truth and purity.

32:35 - You can’t rise above your motive. Live pure. <--- First message Holy Spirit gave me. Your motive is your ceiling. The “why” behind your life determines how high you fly and where you fly.

Need for Appreciation vs. Pure Motive of Love

33:05 - Need for appreciation - We still have tendencies of the fall. We still need affirmation. We still get low in our identity and need to be cheered on.

33:40 - Motivation in encouraging others - from love not to just keep a program functioning smoothly. What if I am encouraging you but by doing that I am keeping alive something that needs to die - your need for appreciation.

34:30 - Don't minister for the sake of the appreciation it will bring - Feeling unappreciated - If I am in a ministry and feeling unappreciated, I need to get a better grip on why I am in the ministry. If I’m in the ministry for you to appreciate me, I am a let down waiting to happen. I don’t do what I do, for you to thank me. I do what I do because I love you and Jesus is Lord. It’s who we are not just what we do. Instead of accommodating the need for appreciation, let’s change the motive of our heart.

35:20 - People leave churches over this - feeling under appreciated. No one said thank you. Are you doing this for appreciation or because of love? Accommodating that with appreciation is not the answer. Let's change the motive of our hearts.

36:05 - We ought to all be in this for the same reason - one mind, one heart, one Spirit. We’re all in this to become love - look like Jesus - to live from the place where He flows.

36:20 - One mind - Pure motive of love - doesn't mean we have to agree on every technicality or doctrine. But that we are all in this to become love. Woke up today - one more day to look like my Father. If that's the motive behind our lives, these other points of disagreement will not be a problem. So along the way we need to encourage one another.

37:10 - Insecurity - driven by what other people think. You’ve got to change motives, not just “medicate” / accommodate / enable those feelings. There shouldn’t be a push to make sure people working with you in ministry feel appreciated. It should be real appreciation. Appreciation should be a given. Should be genuine. The last thing I need is a “thank you.” Don’t enable twisted motives (needing appreciation) which will eventually be their downfall.

39:10 - Find your affirmation in the Lord. Don't draw affirmation from how God is using you.

39:40 - It all goes back to motivation - what makes you tick. Get yourself pure before the Lord - that what you do is for His name sake and for others. That’s the mindset of Christ - what made Him tick and took Him to the cross - let that same mindset be in you - Phil. 2. It's an amazing, humble, yielded, servant hearted thing.

➡ 41:20 - We are talking about motives but having trouble getting to fasting but Matt. 6 talks about this.

Stewardship to Stand in Identity - Dual Nature?

41:30 - Matthew 6 - v.1 - Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. -

Stand firm in the truth of who you are regardless of old feelings or thought patterns - It's outside trying to get back in - Take heed - my responsibility to look into my heart to be sure… (Steward of your own heart). We don’t have a dual nature but we have tendencies from the training / upbringing we get. Renewing of mind - transformation. Our minds need to be restored back to truth. Pulls and tugs of the devil. Old feelings / impulses comes out of nowhere.

43:30 - Ministry crazed - The biggest mistake we make is believing that that is who we still are - you need deliverance, you need help, somebody to get you all the way free. You're selling out and saying, “Because I experienced it, it’s me.” It is so not you. It is outside trying to get back in. But when I say it’s me, I’m surrendering my identity - giving myself over. Now you are getting prayer for something you are not (not who you are) and don’t even want. We need to teach this: it's outside trying to get in.

44:55 - The devil is looking for an opportune time. The devil comes back to just see where you are - gives you a same old thought pattern or temptation or grey you out a little. Now you feel like you did before you were saved. Did I get saved? But it’s not you.

46:00 - Stand firm in truth of your identity - Rise up in truth -Father, I thank You that You have so transformed my life. I so thank You that I am so delivered and so free. There was a time when I felt what I just started to feel coming over me, I would have been crushed for days. I thank You that nothing can crush me now. Because You are the One who lifted me up and raised me up and I am born again and I am free and I am untouchable because You're my God...

46:25 - That sure beats calling for prayer. Don’t need prayer. Need to realize the truth of your identity. Change the way you think to change what you experience. Or you are never going to live by faith / truth. You are going to eat the fruit of your experience instead of eating the fruit of His finished work.

Dual Nature? - No

47:10 - What do you mean when you say we don’t have a “dual nature”? Not even the flesh and the spirit?

The old man died - You are not sin waiting to happen - You have died. The old man is dead - crucified. The new man is put on - he has come - he is raised in the likeness of the resurrection - new creation - Rom. 6:4-5. A lot of people believe they are sin waiting to happen. Sin is inherent in me, burried in me and just waiting to raise its ugly head. If you accept that you give in to the power of sin. Don’t present your members to sin (Rom. 6:13) as if you are bound to serve it. You are not a slave to sin. Don’t you be afraid to declare that you live by the Spirit - that you are righteous in the sight of God - that you are born again. To be born again, something is dead. Something has to die so that something can live. i'm not sin waiting to happen.

49:00 - One of the big mistakes we make in the church - We think that because we have the ability to sin, it’s our identity. What crushes and silences your ability to sin is giving your members unto righteousness for its fruit unto holiness - Rom. 6:22.

49:20 - You are freed from sin - You have the ability to sin but it is not who you are - Romans 6. It doesn’t mean I can’t commit an act of sin if I yield myself to that. But can I give myself continually to God? And keep giving myself to God and actually grow in a stronghold of righteousness to where the things that used to drive me and eat my lunch and be a given in the way of the flesh are no longer. And what was weak is now strong.

49:50 - Objection: The Bible says the flesh is weak - Watch and pray... because the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak. Matt 26:41 “See there brother, Jesus knows the flesh is weak.” Watch and pray. What is He saying? If you watch and pray you are going to live out of the spirit, by the strength of the Spirit and you are going to crush the weakness of the flesh.

50:35 - We identify ourselves with the fall instead of the resurrection. We identify ourselves with sin instead of the image of God. Christ is the redemption of man. He brings us back to that root value - the image of God. He has washed away sin.

50:50 - Objection: “Yeah, brother but we all sin. What, are you saying you are perfect?” That mindset is what keeps man bound in the flesh. Why don’t we rejoice in hearing of righteousness instead of affirming and qualifying sin. Most of the time when that question is asked, that person is living in the consciousness of sin. The Bible says IF I sin, not when. I don't have an appointment with sin. I'm not sinning while I'm breathing. And even if I sin, I have an advocate. Why does the Bible say this? The last thing a Christian is supposed to be doing is even thinking about sin. He is supposed to be thinking “right with God.” I want Jesus - I want to manifest Him - I’m in this thing.

52:20 - I’m a train going down the track of righteousness and I’m not slowing down. If, along that way, I sin, just know you have an advocate - you’re not under the law, you are under grace - just keep trucking and let Me love you and make you what I have called you to be. But don’t you stop running.

53:00 - You can get to a place where you can’t even relate to your past self - It’s called transformation. You can see things for how they really are. That's what the gospel is all about - shining light in the darkness so I can see things for the way they really are.

54:05 - I was not made for sin but for your image. I’m free - Thank You that I am so not made for sin. I am so not made for the flesh. I am so made for Your glory. I am so made for Your righteousness. You knew what You were doing when You made me. Because You made me in Your image. And Christ Jesus, You paid the price to redeem me back to that truth. And You are in me and I am in You. And I thank You that there isn't anything stopping me now. The truth is here. I am free. I'll never be sold cheap again. I'll never be a puppet on a string. I'll never be ruled by a task master because I have a Father and He is in heaven... I talk that way. I think that way. I pray that way.

Counseling Involving Hurts from the Past - Theophostic Ministry

55:20 - What about “theophostic” ministry”? There is something in your past that makes you think this way. It doesn’t fit in with what I preach. I point people to truth, not a “root”. If I point to a root, I’m going to point to a root in God - who you really are. Rejection / hurt happens all the time as we are growing up - not so much individual events. Everybody has had a rough ride - hell and back stories. It’s not about where we’ve been and what we’ve done. It’s about where He’s been and what He’s done that has revealed the truth about me so that I could put the old man off and put the new man on.

58:00 - I don’t have to go through 1000 closet doors and roll 50 stones - find ghosts and skeletons and memories. Understanding the gospel makes all of that null and void.

58:20 - It does not matter that my dad never said I love you, growing up and was an alcoholic and cursed me and said I’d be nothing. It has nothing to do with me, now that Christ has come. So by taking this long road of discovery of the past, I’m teaching myself to live sensual, circumstantial and experiential instead of by faith through Christ’s finished work. And now I have to take life as it comes instead of the gospel as it is. It's a big problem.

59:30 - We’re actually teaching people how not to believe the finished work of Christ. We’re teaching people to live by how they feel. We’re letting “the way that seems right” be laced through the gospel. Teaching people to always look to their past instead of looking up. When are you ever just free? I’m only free if I feel free - WRONG! You're always a person with a problem. That technique keeps you self-focused, self-conscious, me, and feelings. [Example conversations]

101:35 - What they are saying is... I’m in this position. I need your help. It has to have something to do with this (my story). Why do we minister to that? What does any of that have to do with the good news. Why are you trying to get to God through the eye of the needle of your past - when God came to you in the midst? God came to you and snatched you out of the darkness. Why do you need so delivered? Colossians says that you HAVE BEEN delivered from the power of darkness (Col. 1:13). Then why don’t we seem free? Because we look through the mindset of darkness. We're still looking in darkness to find freedom.

103:00 - Five year search to find the truth on these things.

103:45 - Ministry crazed - We think that we have to play detective. You run the risk of letting your identity be wrapped around the ministry you are in. You’ll be defensive of your ministry. Your whole world is around ministering to these people and playing detective and surfacing stuff.

104:15 - Five year search - interviewed counselors and people who went through these ministries.

104:35 - Keys in dark sanctuary - Left keys in sanctuary - door creaks - needed WD-40 - Tales of the Crypt - sister takes Dan’s bedroom. [root of problem? NO]

106:00 - We are not teaching TRANSFORMATION of life and change of heart. I don't need ministry to get that issue of bitterness out of me.

106:50 - Gospel teaches you to live free from fear. When you are selfless, you are fearless because you have nothing to lose you’ve gained everything.

107:10 - Keys (cont.) - I would have locked myself out - door creaks - feeling of fear / flashback of fear felt as a child in the attic.

Counseling Involving Hurts from the Past - Inner Healing

111:25 - Follow the leading of Holy Spirit - Don't go looking for problems on your own - Inner healing - There’s a level of “inner healing” I agree with. When Holy Spirit points to a problem, I flush it out and kill it. I follow Him. But I don’t take Him to where I want to go, looking for a problem. I don’t take Him anywhere - especially into your past. But if Holy Spirit takes me into your past, I'll go there and deal with whatever He wants done.

112:15 - They would have a field day analyzing me - [example of analysis]. You’re teaching me that if I feel something, it is who I am - if I experience something, it is who I am. And if I’m not feeling good, I don’t have the capacity to be good. And we are on a search to feel better, instead of believe better.

113:15 - Keys (cont.) - fear .

115:05 - Ministries when there is no natural knowledge of the root event - I just got a vision that this happened to you when you were one. And that’s why you act the way you act. You’ve got permission to be the way you were. If that happened to you, you would be this way too. Don’t judge me. The gospel is bigger than that. Old things have passed away. If so, then why do we have so much territory to look in. Behold all things are new.

116:15 - Keys (cont.) - discerning of spirits - most of the time the devil stays hidden - sometimes the Holy Spirit will expose what is going on - demon in daughter’s room .

120:00 - Wrong motive for prayer - fear. Devil wants to put fear into you - make you pray because of feeling vulnerable to attack.

120:50 - Lady walking down our street (like a zombie) - those kids never let me rest - demonic spirits - my husband lets them there - you can have peace at your house.

127:55 - Keys (cont.) - "See, Dan, they are outside trying to get in."

129:00 - Many of these people would want to take me into a room and heal that little boy (who had the Tales of the Crypt fears). But that little boy died the day I got born again. I need to change my perspective not go fishing (for causes of fear from my past). Outside, trying to get in.

➡ 129:45 - We didn’t get to fasting but we sure got to motives. Fasting - Isaiah 58

130:50 - We give natural knowledge so much power because we are psychological people instead of faith people. We make things have to matter because of natural knowledge. Human sentiment - human need.

131:25 - hypothetical - 80 yr old man comes to office - former neighbor - took advantage of kids - Do you know Jesus? Thank God you are born again. If natural knowledge about the past can mess you up so bad, why are we digging around in the past so much? Why aren’t we just living by truth that makes us free. Continue in the word, not continue in yesterday. You'll know the truth and the truth will make you free.

136:35 - BREAK